Announcing John Fasano's Screenwriting Workshops

Well, this is something to take note of. Our pal John Fasano -- one of only maybe five guys who has had a 2-decade-plus career as a working Hollywood writer -- has announced his first-ever Screenwriting Workshop. John is an incredible storyteller and probably one of the best teachers around. Here is a rare chance to learn from someone who has actually DONE IT. On top of that, he's offering a 10% discount to Coverage Ink clients. Read all about the workshops below and then visit his site. Then when you're ready to rock, e-mail him at TITMinc (at) gmail.com and say, "Man, let's do this!"

--Jim C.


FROM YOUR HEAD TO THE PAGE

Learn the craft of screenwriting with Hollywood’s most prolific screenwriter, John Fasano.

In a world where getting a single script sold is a major accomplishment, WGA award nominated Screenwriter John Fasano has more than forty credits on feature films and prime time television including:  Another 48 HRS, Darkness Falls, Alien 3, Universal Soldier: The Return and Tombstone.

Former president of the Sony/Canal + Equinoxe Screenwriting seminar in Bordeaux, France and guest lecturer at AFI and the Writer’s Boot Camp, John will personally guide you from concept to script.  Classes will be held in a private Brentwood, California location. Enrollment will be limited to ten students per class so personal attention is ensured!

BEGINNING SCREENWRITING • JUNE 1 thru 2, 2013
Transforming your “big idea” into a viable outline.  Find the outlining method that works best for you. Who are your main characters?  Structure is the key.  Learn how to create a three-act structure that brings your story to life. Prerequisite:  An idea you’d like to transform into a screenplay.

$300 for two-day class*

John Fasano at the helm.

 INTERMEDIATE SCREENWRITING • JUNE 8 thru 9, 2013
Complete the journey from outline to script.  Write scenes that bring your characters to life and reveal their distinct voices.  Learn what makes great dialogue with tension on emotional and physical levels. Bonus:  Preparing to face the marketplace.  An insider’s secrets to success. Prerequisite:  A fleshed-out outline or draft of your screenplay.

$300 for two-day class*

For more information and to register contact us at: TITMinc [at] gmail.com

*10% discount for clients of Coverage, Ink.

In addition to his screenwriting John is also an accomplished Director and Producer.  His feature film credits include:  Another 48 HRS, Darkness Falls, Universal Soldier: The Return, Judge Dredd, Rapid Fire, Cargo, Tombstone, Sniper Reloaded, Sniper 5: Kill Zone, Alien 3, as well as story development for Alien vs. Predator, Flushed Away, Marvel Comics', Werewolf by Night and Hostel: Part III.  His projects for television include:  The Hunchback (WGA nomination for best teleplay), The Profiler, F/X The Series, Hannah’s Law, the Tom Selleck hit Stone Cold, The Hunley, Saving Jessica Lynch and Lifetime’s highly rated Holiday Switch.  John also works in New Media, creating and writing the Sony/Crackle series Woke Up Dead starring Jon Heder and the Anime feature version of the video game Saints Row.  

Writers on the Storm Finalists to be Announced 5/1/13

Just a slight delay, less than a week, so please don't be too angry with us! The truth is we have tough choices to make still. 50 scripts down to 10. Ugh. It never gets any easier. But we will announce our top 10 finalists, TV and features, on May 1.

Is there a Brooks Elms/Glenn Sanders in this year's batch? Brooks and Glenn are last year's winners, who got signed by UTA and their careers are now exploding. They've both landed writing assignments, and they have another project with a major producer attached which I can't say anything more about yet -- except to say holy crap, our boys done good!

So until then, sit tight -- aw heck, don't sit tight. if you made our top 50, you should definitely enter the Nicholl as well, so hurry up and get your script in quick as the deadline is rolling in fast. I seem to recall back in the day entry was free. Ha!, yeah, not anymore. Best of luck and KEEP WRITING.

Jim C.

WOTS Semi-Finalists

Writers on the Storm semifinalists are now posted! http://writerstorm.com/(and also below for your convenience.) By now, everyone should have received your feedback forms. If you haven't, please 1) check your spam filter for anything from writerstorm, then 2) email Julie at writerstorm@gmail.com and we will resend right away.

BIG Congrats to everyone who made the cut. And to the vast majority who didn't -- we feel your pain. We've all been there. Every one of us have been eliminated from contests, from consideration for jobs, grants, assignments, from so many things. Being a writer means you have to learn to take getting whacked upside the head repeatedly and pretend you're OK with it. 

The only thing I can say is, hey -- yeah, it sucks, BUT... maybe it's only a draft away. Check out the feedback and really study it closely. The stuff that made the reader balk could be fixable relatively easily. It's worth that extra level of scrutiny. It's easy enough to say "These people are idiots" and forget about it. And maybe we are. But if the feedback is even close to the mark, then as students of the biz we should all take it under consideration and at least chew it over. Knowledge is power, and sometimes even iffy notes can make us think of creative solutions or better ways to approach situations in your story. Best of luck to everyone, and to all my fellow writers: I APPLAUD YOU. 

Now comes the hard part: whittling these down to the top ten by the end of April, when they will be posted right here and of course on our facebook page. Yikes.

Much love -- Jim C.

WOTS VI SEMIFINALISTS

FEATURES

20 Million Rides To Earth by Erik Ratiff 

A Rising Tide by Chris Knight 

All God's Children by Natalie Hanson 

American Supervillains by Andrew Watt 

Arctic Circle by Daniel Ragussis

The Basement by Dawn Marie Guernsey 

The Bond by Kim Putman 

Bullets for Silverware by Jim Antonini 

Cake by Patrick Tobin 

Carn Evil by Jason Siner 

Clouds of Sorrow by Jack Davidson 

Common Ground by Robert Fullerton 

Confiteor by William Shedlick 

The Contestant by Allen Hahn 

Covers by Francis Jay 

Damascus Cover by Daniel Berk 

Dead Dolores by Michael Yagnow 

The Deal by Brian Fox 

Due Process by Shaun Raad 

Equipoise by William Shedlick 

Francis Lange by C.M. Robinson 

Fury by Dane McCauley 

The Galaxy’s Littlest Prince by Joe Borriello

The Guide by Henry Radoff 

Hap by Brian Nicol 

The Heckler by Mike Hanson 

The Idea of Fireflies by Don Balch + Zack Smith 

Illusion by Suzanne Kelman  

La Mujer (The Woman) by Steve Lucas 

The Last Lifeboat by Luke Yankee  

Lawman by Kingston Medland + Kingsley Medland 

Lulu by Samuel Bernstein 

On the Edge (aka Speedville) by Patrick Hunt 

One Bad Day by L.E. Bond 

Orange Dissection by TJ Barkwill

Passing Through by Robert G. Rhyne

Petrology by Colin Mummery

Probable Cause by Shane McCabe

Resilience by Lena Slachmuijlder

The Rim Of The World by Bettina Moss

Rum House by Michael Sieve

Second Earth (aka Divergence) by Victor Grippi

Self-Storage by Glenn McGee

Seven Times Seventy by Laura Lagasse

Silas by Scott Parisien

Sleeping Beauty by Tony Boland

Slippery Things by Lane Baker

The Taloquan Network by Robert Hestand

Theory of Everything by Tim McSmythurs

Wild Bill Rides Again by Jim Antonini

Wormweed by John + Jessica Walker

TV

Borderland by Mark O'Neill + Jonathan Ross

Ditch Plains by Bernard Urban

Freebird - And This Bird You Cannot Change by Simon Kay

Freetown - Pilot by Jeremy Dickens

Lovecraft by Levi Bailey

Messiah Project by David Baugnon

Path by Michael A Wright

The RetroCog by Steve Morris

Shaman by Eric Ian Steele

Sitters by James Papa

Stealing Home by Sebastian Arboleda

Strategic Services

Teen Spirit by Jacob Burstein-Stern

The Thief and the Prophecies by Barry Leach

Triple Agent by Steve Morris

The World by Kathleen Cromie

Wilbur Shaw by C.M. Robinson

The Death of "Daily Variety" and the Return of "Creative Screenwriting"

Talk about yer good news/bad news! First the bad: Daily Variety, that venerable showbiz rag that informed the biz for the better part of a century, is now gone. Like The Hollywood Reporter did a year ago, the daily has ceased publication, and will be replaced by a combination of web/email updates and a weekly print magazine.

The trades, as we know them, have ceased to exist.

Now I can go on for hours about the logic of this decision. The cost of printing, paper and postage are ever-rising; the economics of a daily paper just don't make sense anymore in our bankster/military industrial complex-controlled society. Furthermore, Daily Variety by its very nature delivered yesterday's news every day. Obviously, websites like Deadline and of course variety.com and hollywoodreporter.com can be far more timely. With most of us getting our info constantly blasted at us via smartphones, a paper publication seems almost quaint.

Still, and please forgive a little rant, but this frickin' sucks. Some of us grew up with, and still love, the trades as we know them -- and that means on paper. You can't read a website on the subway or in a no-wifi zone. I like reading the trades every day over dinner and so forth. My partner and I read and talk about articles. It's fun. I can't see us doing that with a smartphone. And yeah, we can do that with the new weekly edition, but it's not the same of course, since it's not going to be there every day, now is it? There's a reason I canceled my Hollywood Reporter subscription when they went digital and switched to Variety. Now who am I going to switch to?

Well, how about CREATIVE SCREENWRITING?

The cover of the very first CS, when it was a zine.

And now the good news. Erik Bauer, the founder and original publisher of Creative Screenwriting and the creator of the Screenwriting Expo and the CS Open writing tournament, has just purchased CS back.

As many of you know, both Creative Screenwriting and Script magazines also ceased publication last year (are you sensing a trend?) Creative Screenwriting had seen the brand get tarnished a bit in recent years, as management tried to keep the ship afloat without much success;  unfortunately, they couldn't make good on some promises in the final year or two. It was a sad end to a once-great magazine and platform for screenwriting education.

Not one to let his baby get folded, spindled and mutilated, Bauer has stepped back in and seized the reins. He plans to analyze the business carefully, then implement initiatives to revitalize the brand and hopefully rebuild any burned bridges.

What does this all mean for screenwriters? Is the Expo coming back? How about the magazine? Bauer says that right now the focus will be on rebuilding and restoring the website; he'll be making decisions on when/how to proceed with the Expo and the magazine in the future. Clearly, it's a brave new world out there, and online rules the day. Bauer wants to proceed carefully and make sure that CS will be as innovative in the new media space as it was almost 20 years ago when it became the very first print publication about screenwriting.

As a long-time columnist for Creative Screenwriting, I'm excited for the future and wish CS the best moving forward. The best is yet to come!

Jim C.

Cardin' It Out Old School-Style

TWISTED is a messed-up horror/time travel movie written by Tanya Klein and yours truly, to be directed by LIBERATOR director Aaron Pope. For the last six months or so, we've been developing this as Coverage Ink's first feature film, which we plan to shoot this fall. We're pretty pleased with the script, but there was something in Act 2 that was just not sitting right. The script's only 100 pages, yet it felt like maybe it's running a bit long. But why/how/where?

We narrowed the issue to the end of Act 2. A certain ennui was creeping in there, a feeling of enervation. But in scrutinizing our structure, it looked spot-on; and every scene felt necessary and important. We couldn't cut anything without wrecking the delicate chain-of-dominos structure. That's when I realized that we needed to go back to basics. Time to break out the ol' index cards.

"Twisted" act 2, all carded out and color coded.

Of course, first I tried the index card feature of Final Draft. It's pretty cool that with a press of a button, you can have ready-to-print mini versions of all your scenes. Problem is, they're not color-coded (I always like to color-code my cards based on character so one can quickly see if a character is off screen for too long or hogging too many scenes in a row.) Easy enough to fix with markers, but the real issue is, FD's cards just give you a snippet of the dialogue at the top of each scene. I wanted PROPER index cards, you know, which list the important plot events in the scene at a glance. And so for the first time in probably ten years, I ripped into a pack of actual index cards (cutting them in half because they were too freakin' big) and carded out Act 2.

A couple things popped out right away. An important cutaway suggested itself for a character we hadn't seen in a while; another two scenes felt like they could easily be consolidated into one. But it wasn't until Tanya and I went over the cards scene by scene that lo and behold, we found The Issue.  Around page 70 or so, our protagonist has rescued her three siblings -- uniting the beleaguered family for the first time since they were taken prisoner. From here there was about 15 pages of them being pursued and then finally taking out the henchmen before rushing into act 3. Tanya quickly sussed out that we don't need any of that. With one fell swoop, six index cards went away. We cut right from the reunification scene to the siblings taking out the henchmen. It worked perfectly. That cut probably saved us thousands and lopped a couple days off the schedule. And when you're shooting the thing yourself, that's important as hell. But even better, we solved the problem that had been bugging everyone and kept our intensity level high right into the end of the second act.

Sometimes I think when you've been doing this for a while, you kinda start to think you know everything. "Yeah, I know structure; I know the Save the Cat! beat sheet, I know the UCLA method and Writer's Journey/Joseph Campbell and blah blah blah..." You think you can take shortcuts. But when push comes to shove, some damn index cards and markers got it done where two smart writers who know all this stuff backwards and forwards could not.

Deal the cards, my friends!

--Jim C.

WRITERS ON THE STORM VI QUARTERFINALISTS

Hi, folks! We proudly present the Writers on the Storm Quarterfinalists for 2013. This list represents approximately the top-scoring 10% of our submissions for this year. We'll be sending out the feedback forms over the next few weeks via e-mail. If you have not received yours by month's end, please check your spam folder, and then email us at writerstorm@gmail.com. Up next: The SEMI-finalists (top 50) coming April 1st. Thanks, everyone, for participating!



FEATURES

20 Million Rides To Earth by Erik Ratiff

A Rising Tide by Chris Knight
 
Albert's Lie 2013 by Judy Vann

All God's Children by Natalie Hanson

American Supervillains by Andrew Watt

An Atom of Freedom by Yehuda Yaakov

Arctic Circle by Daniel Ragussis

The Basement by Dawn Marie Guernsey

Better Days by Kingston Medland

The Bloodline by Christine Feldman

Bioterror Conspiracy by Louis Lio

The Bond by Kim Putman

Bullets for Silverware by Jim Antonini
 
Butterfly Children by Melanie Schiele

Cake by Patrick Tobin

Carn Evil by Jason Siner

Clouds of Sorrow by Jack Davidson

Common Ground by Robert Fullerton

Confiteor by William Shedlick
 
Conflict Resolution by Don Hofmeister

The Contestant by Allen Hahn

Covers by Francis Jay

Creeped by Robert Chomiak

Damascus Cover by Daniel Berk

Dead Dolores by Michael Yagnow

The Deal by Brian Fox

Degenerate by Karen Frank

The Devil Knows Your Name by Malibo Jackk

Diamond Express by Kyle Curry

Diamond Jim and the Blue Rose of Brazil by Carl B. Clark

Ding-Dong-Ditch by Erin Donovan
 
Dirty River by Jeremy Novick

Dogs of the Pacific by Julian Surface + Pat Gaston + Travis Parke

Due Process by Shaun Raad

Equipoise by William Shedlick

Faking It by Scott Taylor

Fifty-Nine Lost by Lynn Betts
 
Francis Lange by C.M. Robinson

Frontman by Elise Carr + Dennis Carr

Fury by Dane McCauley

The Galaxy's Littlest Prince by Joe Borriello

Game On by Hamilton Mitchell

Garden of Lost Souls by James Scott Mason
 
The Guide by Henry Radoff

Haber by Daniel Ragussis

Hap by Brian Nicol

The Heckler by Mike Hanson

How Deep Is Your Love by Noga Pnueli

The Idea of Fireflies by Don Balch + Zack Smith

Illusion by Suzanne Kelman
 
Inner City by Scott Taylor

Isolation by Mark Allen

Kosovo by Tim Guay

La Mujer (The Woman) by Steve Lucas

Lady Smoke by John Celona

Ladykilaz by Karen Hope

The Last Lifeboat by Luke Yankee
 
Lawman by Kingston Medland + Kingsley Medland

Live from the Milky Way by Joe Borriello

Lulu by Samuel Bernstein

Nerdgasm by Sara Williams
 
Ninety Nine Days by Francis Jay

Ole by Jon Price

On the Edge (aka Speedville) by Patrick Hunt

One Bad Day by L.E. Bond

One Night Stan by Tony Boland

Orange Dissection by TJ Barkwill

The Orchid with the Petals of Velvet by Justin Kosch
 
Passing Through by Robert G. Rhyne

Petrology by Colin Mummery

The Plutonium Blonde by John Zakour

Prion by Tom McCarron

Probable Cause by Shane McCabe

Redemption by Scott Yedvarb
 
Rematch by Antoine Mizel

Resilience by Lena Slachmuijlder

Reverse the Curse by Steven D'Arcangelo

Ride to Vengeance by Dave Vaughan

The Rim Of The World by Bettina Moss
 
Rum House by Michael Sieve

The Savior by Wade Ballance

Second Earth (aka Divergence) by Victor Agrippi

Self-Storage by Glenn McGee

Settling the Books by Russ Meyer
 
Seven Times Seventy by Laura Lagasse

Silas by Scott Parisien

Sins of the Father by Randy Oliver

Sleeping Beauty by Tony Boland

Slippery Things by Lane Baker

The Something by David Hudacek
 
Stay (aka Layered) by Jocelyn Osier

The System by Amy Whittenberger

The Taloquan Network by Robert Hestand

Theatre of Death by James B. Saunders

Theory of Everything by Tim McSmythurs

The Tiniest Prince in a Big Galaxy by Joe Borriello

Tranquility Base by Daniel Turkewitz

The Undeflowered Maiden by GK Noyer

Under Erciyes (Under the White Mountain) by Janet Ritz

Wild Bill Rides Again by Jim Antonini
 
Wormweed by John + Jessica Walker


TV PILOTS

Blue Light by Andrew Fisk

Borderland by Mark O'Neill + Jonathan Ross

By the Book by Robert Kuang

Cass McGhee is a Werewolf by Dorian Hess
 
Ditch Plains by Bernard Urban

Dream Walker by Chris Hutton

Freebird - And This Bird You Cannot Change by Simon Kay

Freetown - Pilot by Jeremy Dickens

Goth and Jock by Jay Joseph

Konspirasi by W. Palmer
 
Level 4 by Frederick Kim

Lovecraft by Levi Bailey

Matt Sneed - Adolescent! by Jordan Jacobson

Messiah Project by David Baugnon

Milltown - The Devil We Know by Bob Gookin

Night Clan - Identity by Felicia C. Ansty
 
Ordnung by Aaron Rollins

Path by Michael A Wright

The RetroCog by Steve Morris

The Second Oldest Profession by Jim Bernfield

The Sensualist by Suzanne Griffin

Shaman by Eric Ian Steele
 
Sitters by James Papa

Stealing Home by Sebastian Arboleda

Strategic Services by Jonathan Jones + Francisco Magdaraog

Super Phillainy by Jeffrey Meurer

Tainted by Elisa Graybill

Teen Spirit by Jacob Burstein-Stern
 
The Thief and the Prophecies by Barry Leach

Touched by Anthony Ripo

Triple Agent by Steve Morris

The World by Kathleen Cromie

Underland Pilot by Garon Cockrell

Wilbur Shaw by C.M. Robinson

Got Pilot? Tracking B TV Contest LATE DEADLINE!

Why are we posting about someone else's contest? Because it's the Tracking B TV Contest. And the late deadline is March 3rd.

It's expensive to enter, and there are no prizes per se. So why the heck should you enter? Because Tracking B is a real-life industry tracking board subscribed to by movers and shakers. They have a STUNNING success rate. A top-tier TV industry panel reads the entries, and every year there's another success story or two -- people getting signed, staffed, and so on. It's fricking remarkable. This is one of the few contests (other than our own) that we consistently recommend year after year as being worth the dough.

Now get a load of their industry panel:

 
Get one of these folks on your team and the picture changes radically. Check out their website for the the skinny on their incredible "track" record. So if you've got a pilot, get over to TrackingB.com before it's too late. You may very well be glad you did. Good luck.

Writers on the Storm Quarterfinalists This Monday!

It may be down to the wire, but we hope to post the full list of WOTS VI quarterfinalists this Monday, March 4th. This includes the previously posted QFs from the Coverage Ink side (minus two fellows we sadly had to disqualify, Karl Schiffman and Robert Chomiak, for both having career screenwriting earnings in excess of $10,000 - great writers both, but rules is rools) and everyone else who entered on writerstorm.com or WithoutaBox. The quarterfinalists will represent roughly the top 10% of our submissions.

There's going to be shouts of joy, tears, cursing, frustration -- the works. We know. We've all been there. Rejection is one of the most "fun" things about screenwriting, and even after two decades in Hollywood, every "pass" still pains me a bit. For for the vast majority of you who will not make the cut, I hope the feedback forms will give you an idea how close to the mark the reader felt you were and what areas in particular need the most TLC. Sometimes the difference between a pass and a consider are a few tweaks you can make in an afternoon.

Hang tight. More to come, folks!

Jim C.

Are Script Expos, Coverage Services and Picthfests Scams? (Pt 1)

David Know of Deadline.com has just posted part one of what promises to be a really juicy series. As we all know, the answer to the headline (also the name of the article) is: sometimes, yeah. And let the buyer beware!

Yes, the business of screenwriting will always attract shysters willing to prey on people with a dollar and a dream. Yes, there are many people who talk a similar rhetoric about ‘paradigms’ and ‘character arcs’ so it all feels like a con or cult built around scripting for showbiz. But some people must find it all useful, right?

Check out part one, which addresses the pros and cons of pitch fests, among other things, and features quotes from yours truly as well as a nice assortment of people who know what they're talking about. There are some really smart, worth-it folks out there offering valuable help; and there are indeed a few people out there who really don't know what the hell they're talking about and really shouldn't be offering their services as script readers or consultants in any way, shape or form. Looking forward to the next installment. Bring it, David!

Writers on the Storm FINAL DEADLINE 2-10-13!

Over $25,000 Cash & Prizes
$10K Grand Prize (features) $2,500 (TV)
Two Winners Signed to UTA the Past Two Years
We’re going for the three-peat. Are you IN?

Egads, time is running short! As of midnight Sunday 2/10/13 (which is really 12:01 AM Monday,) our Without a Box contest extension is over and we close the door on Writers on the Storm VI. We know there are still a couple of you guys out there polishing, and we're psyched about that. We all need deadlines to really light a fire under our butts from time to time! As we've seen time and again in the CS and Cyberspace Open, sometimes we do our best work when there's a gun to our heads.

Tick tick tick tick....

So once more for the record: Writers on the Storm VI closes for good Sunday night at midnight. You can enter the contest right here. And yes, it's expensive ($75 for features, $70 for a TV pilot.) This is the super-LATE entry period. The entry fee was dirt cheap in the early and regular entry periods. Now we are down to the wire. But discounts are still available via Without a Box if you sign up with them on their site.

And now, we proudly present our final list of early quarterfinalists. these are folks who entered the contest via script submission to Coverage Ink (that deal has now expired.) In coverage, after the several pages of detailed analysis, there is a grid showing how you did in key areas, followed by a recommendation for both script and writer: pass, consider with reservations, consider, strong consider or recommend. Those who received a consider with reservations or better for SCRIPT (roughly top 10%) became automatic quarterfinalists, and their scripts move to the next round where they will be read again.

At least, that's the way it's supposed to go. But this year I think maybe our readers may have been a collection of stone hard-asses, because the percentage is more like top 4% instead of top 10%. So, nice work to the quarterfinalists so far! Naturally, we will be announcing the full list of quarterfinalists about 6 weeks after the final deadline (approximately March 20.)

WRITERS ON THE STORM QUARTERFINALISTS SO FAR

1) Theory of Everything by Tim McSmythurs
2) My Asshole Neighbor by Andrew Currie + Robert Chomiak
3) The Galaxy's Littlest Prince by Joe Borriello
4) On the Edge by Patrick Hunt
5) Wormweed by John + Jessica Walker
6) Russian Roulette by Karl Schiffman
7) Stay (aka Layered) by Jocelyn Osier
8) Messiah Project (TV) by David Baugnon
9) Dead Dolores by Michael Yagnow
10) American Supervillains by Andrew Watt
11) Carn Evil by Jason Siner
12) An Atom of Freedom by Yehuda Yaakov
13) Creeped by Robert Chomiak
14) Damascus Cover by Daniel Berk + Samantha Newton
15) Live from the Milky Way by Joe Borriello
16) The Thief and the Prophecies (TV) by Barry Leach
17) Second Earth (aka Divergence) by Victor Agrippi)
18) Konspirasi (TV) by W. Palmer
19) Nerdgasm by Sara Williams

LAST CHANCE - ENTER NOW! 

For full details please visit the contest website at http://writerstorm.com.

Coverage Ink/Writers on the Storm Newsletter

January 2013

1) We Need to Talk About "We Need to Talk About Kevin"
2) Writers on the Storm Quarterfinalists So Far
3) Agent's Hot Sheet: The New Paradigm

WRITERS ON THE STORM IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

Writers on the Storm closes at midnight January 9th on writerstorm.com and coverageink.com. After that we will have a 1-month extension exclusive to WithoutaBox. 

This is your last chance to enter the contest at Coverage Ink and get coverage + contest entry for the price of coverage alone. As of 1/10, all submissions to Coverage Ink will receive our usual in-depth coverage but will NOT be entered into Writers on the Storm. From 1/10 until the final deadline (2/9,) the only way to enter will be on Without a Box. Good luck!

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT "WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KEVIN"

Hi folks,

Short newsletter this month (but hopefully no less worth reading.) Last night I finally saw "We Need to Talk About Kevin," the 2011 Cannes darling directed by Lynne Ramsay (Ratcatcher) and written by Ramsay and Rory Kinnear, based on the novel by Lionel Shriver. If you've seen the film, you know it deals with an uncomfortable subject: how can two seemingly normal, caring parents raise a frickin' maniac? But from a screenwriting as well as moviemaking point of view, there are quite a few things worth discussing. Let's do, shall we? WARNING: SPOILERS!

In "Kevin," Tilda Swinton ("Chronicles of Narnia") plays Eva, a mom who cannot connect with her manipulative, sociopathic son, played brilliantly by three actors: Rocky Ruer (toddler,) Jasper Newell (age 6-8) and the mesmerizing Ezra Miller (teen.) We're witnessing the genesis of a killer, and we figure out early on that the film is heading towards a big Columbine-like event at the conclusion. Needless to say, the film felt horribly timely, coming on the heels of the school shootings in Connecticut (although the weapon of choice here is a bow and arrow.) Evil is as evil does, and despite ample nurturing and attention from parents Swinton and John C. Reilly ("Stepbrothers"), from a very early age, Kevin is right up there with Damien from "The Omen" -- a creepy, malevolent little shit you want to strangle.

One of the rules of screenwriting we're bludgeoned with is "show, don't tell." What this means is, since cinema is a visual medium, it's better to show us something that to tell it. For example, let's say your protagonist used to be a cop but was thrown off the force after a big scandal involving ten hookers, a senator and a llama. Now you could TELL the readers this in a clunky, expository bit of dialogue; or you could put a flashback scene at the very top SHOWING the scandal going down, which works a lot better in a movie. In "Kevin," the screenwriters sagely embraced the "show, don't tell" ethos. There's a lot of character backstory in the novel they had to get out, and they chose to depict it all visually, every bit of it, mostly using wordless flashback scenes (there is a lot of jumping around in the time continuum, which we'll discuss in a moment.) So we see young Tilda and John in love in New York, young Tilda the famous world traveler and travel writer being carried away in some crazy tomato festival, pregnant Tilda uncomfortable with impending motherhood in a Lamaze class, and so forth.

The problem is, it's a bit confusing. Oftentimes we have no idea what's going on, what we're looking at. The tomato festival, for example, starts the film. But we the audience don't know what it means. It feels like an abstract sequence, something from an art film. If we knew, for example, where she was and that she was covering this event for a travel book, then we'd go, "Oh, okay." In fact it isn't until two-thirds of the way through that we learn she used to be a travel writer. When this is finally spoken, everything finally makes sense -- the maps on the wall, her getting a job at a travel agency, and so forth. So here we have a case of a little too much show, don't tell. In "Kevin," we really, really need a dollop of "tell." Sometimes direct exposition is indeed just what the doctor ordered.

We learn in the DVD extras that the flashbacks to pregnant Eva and the scenes of her with baby Kevin were meant to illustrate -- again, with images only -- that Eva was a reluctant mother and didn't put her heart into it, perhaps because of her career. Well, this came completely out of the blue and in fact, didn't read on film at all. None of those scenes conveyed to us anything about Eva not being into being a mom. Just the opposite, in fact. We infer that Eva puts aside her career to raise her child, and patiently tries anything and everything to communicate, play with and bond with her son, who rejects all of it, even as a toddler. In other words, the filmmakers failed utterly at conveying this specific character trait through visual-only means. How about a nice husband/wife scene where they talk about how she doesn't want to have a baby, it's going to wreck her career, or that she can't handle this screaming hellion anymore and they need to hire a nanny? To be clear, I'm all for show, don't tell, and the filmmakers are to be lauded for attempting to capture the mindset of the characters from the novel visually. It just didn't quite work. In adapting a novel, sometimes you need to verbalize the thoughts and emotions which are in a character's head.

Tilda Swinton, ostensibly not feeling the whole pregnancy thing.

In order to pull off all this show, don't tell, the filmmakers utilized a rather unique structure. No Save the Cat! paradigm here. There is no inciting incident, no midpoint turning point, no black moment at the end of Act 2. Yet "Kevin" is never anything less than compelling, which certainly proves that alternative structures can work when well-handled (and well-acted.) The story ping-pongs back and forth between numerous time frames, beginning with desperate, lonely and bereft Eva's present-day semi-existence, and then flashing back to various stages of her life and Kevin's development to tell most of the movie. The three acts loosely roll out as: Kevin as a toddler, Kevin aged 6-8, and finally, Kevin as a truly insidious teen. But even within this context, there are frequent jumps to other periods, including back to the present, featuring a minor subplot about Eva's ostracization by society and making a go of it in a crappy new job. It's a tricky and difficult structure to pull off, and the writers deserve big kudos for making it work.

But one thing that doesn't quite work is that post-incident, Eva is a pariah. She is subject to a non-stop torrent of vitriol by an angry public, which includes her house and car being splattered with red paint, verbal abuse from coworkers and even a right cross from an old lady. This treatment would really only make sense if she was the killer. Sure, there are going to be plenty of people angry, and some might indeed blame the mom. But considering her husband and young daughter were also murdered in the attack, and that Eva has moved from the murder home and now lives in a dumpy shack near the railroad where it would be a stretch for people to find her, the hostility feels a bit forced. Surely many would be sympathetic. She, too, lost everything.

To be fair, there is a nice moment when one of the victims rolls up in his wheelchair and is friendly with her. The filmmakers are making a valid statement here about how we as a society react to tragedy, of course. But perhaps this too would have more resonance if they'd also successfully painted Eva as the checked-out or self-centered mom they seemed to think they were portraying, as opposed to the bend-over-backwards-to-fix-this-kid lady we see on screen. Late in the movie, Eva takes teen Kevin out to dinner in an attempt to bond with her son. He cuts her to the quick by anticipating how much she's going to drink and everything she's going to say. It's mother/son psychology folded, spindled and mutilated, and it's a breathtaking scene. But the point here was to illustrate that she's just been pretending to care for Kevin's entire life, and he knows it, so cut the shit. It doesn't really play, because we've seen her care. In fact, the one scene where she loses patience with 8-year-old Kevin and hurls him to the ground, breaking his arm, we're right there with her. You'll be ready to smash this kid's head in as well.

The point of this all is that, while this is a flawed movie, there is much to be learned from it. As writers, we often get pigeonholed into writing formulaic structure; Like "Memento" and "Pulp Fiction," "Kevin" blasts that to pieces and shows you can indeed tell a great story in a non-linear way. Add in spectacular performances, creeping tension and a theme that resonates with what's going on right now, and you have a movie that should be on every screenwriter's Netflix list. Check it out and then hit me back and let me know what you thought!

+++

It's January. Know what that means? The return of spec season is almost upon us. Every year, once everyone gets back from Sundance, they start reading scripts. February through May is usually an intense period of spec activity. Buyers have usually refilled their coffers (new fiscal year) and are ready to pick up some scripts. So now is the time to get your polish on and get ready to rock. Check out my Agent's Hot Sheet article below which I think you'll find helpful -- "the New Paradigm." I wish you all the best of luck with your screenplays and an exciting new year fraught with opportunity!

Sincerely,

 

Jim Cirile, founder

Coverage Ink/Writers on the Storm

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Writers on the Storm Quarterfinalists (So Far!)

Hi folks, here is the updated list of Writers on the Storm 2012/13 Quarterfinalists to date. If you're wondering how we can already have some quarterfinalists to announce, it's because these folks entered the contest by submitting to Coverage Ink. When you do that, you receive full coverage and complimentary contest entry; if your script garners a "consider with reservations" or better for script, you're a quarterfinalist, and your script moves to the next round where it is read again.

Everyone else who enters the contest via writerstorm.com or WithoutaBox has to wait until after the contest's final deadline (2/9, on WithoutaBox only) to find out whether they're a quarterfinalist. Does this give the folks who entered via Coverage Ink an advantage? Damn right, because those folks get to see what we think of their scripts in advance, fix any problems and then resubmit a polished draft back to the contest before the final end date. if you want to take advantage of this, the deadline to submit at coverageink.com is midnight 1/9/13. 

A round of applause for our amazing 12 quarterfinalists (TV and features) so far!

Theory of Everything by Tim McSmythurs
My Asshole Neighbor by Andrew Currie + Robert Chomiak
The Galaxy's Littlest Prince by Joe Borriello
On the Edge by Patrick Hunt
Wormweed by John + Jessica Walker
Russian Roulette by Karl Schiffman
Stay by Jocelyn Osier
Messiah Project by David Baugnon
Dead Dolores by Michael Yagnow
American Supervillains by Andrew Watt
Carn Evil by Jason Siner
An Atom of Freedom by Yehuda Yaakov

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